As many of you know, I have been gone for a few months. Perhaps you did not notice, but I can not fault you for being as unobservant as I am. We have been dealing with a family problem and I have debated as to the issue of sharing this. After deep contemplation and thought, I decided to write this in hopes that it might help some one.
You see, my wife's sister, Angelina, was diagnosed as being terminal about two month ago. Last Sunday she passed away.
Death happens eventually to everyone and is a part of life. So, why would I debate writing about it? Because it was a death that could have been postponed for several years, if she had not have abused alcohol.
Angelina, Angel to her friends, had some issues that she could not deal with. Issues that eventually brought her to the bottle and left her saturating her liver daily, until her liver eventually gave out.
Unobservant as ever, it took me some time to notice it. She functioned well most of the time and did not smell of booze. For others they knew of it, but did not know how to approach her about it. Some, did approach her, but incurred her wrath for suggesting that she had a problem. Yet, by the time I noticed her heavy drinking it was too late. Within days, she was in the hospital with liver failure.
It was her fault. She looked for solutions at the bottom of a bottle. She should have sought help from those who were close. When my wife heard of the issues, she tried desperately to get Angel to seek professional help for those issues. She never did. If she had, perhaps she would have found a better solution then "Jack," "Jim" or "Smirnoff." These "friends" offered nothing more then a "buzz" of good feeling that hide the issues deep, until they wore off.
In the wake of her issues being hidden, she eventually solved her problems with death and created more issues for her husband, her sons, her sisters, her brothers, other family and friends. Instead of seeking help, she drowned her problems and in doing so, passed around grief and pain with pieces for others to pick up.
I am not against drinking. I am against drinking in excess and substituting real help with temporary good feelings.
I ask any of you reading this, that may have issues of your own and have sought to feel good through the bottle or drugs to seek help before you leave your loved ones to pick up the pieces.